I’ve always admired the Arch for his outspokenness and his latest anti-hom*ophobic rant is no exception. However, he seems to have angered some of his fellow Christians with his “Love thy neighbour” and “Do not judge lest ye be judged” attitude with regard to hom*osexuals.
Speak to any group of Christians about hom*osexuality and you invariably get a response of “The Bible say’s it’s wrong” or “It’s a Sin”, or the rather smug “Judge the sin, not the sinner”. Well, good on you but WHERE exactly does the Bible say it’s wrong? Oh, well that’s easy. Leviticus 18:22 Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is an abomination.
Apparently, it’s also mentioned in verse 20:13 but the former is the one that most anti-gay Christians will hammer you with as proof that God disapproves of Gays. (It is also referenced in Romans, Epistles, Matthew and Acts but the Leviticus verse is one most quoted and the one most remembered by the anti-gay brigade.)
There are some sensible Christians who believe that the laws of Leviticus do not apply to modern Christians as they were laws set by priests for the tribes of Israel, more specifically the Levites. However, this does not explain the gay-bashing using this specific bible verse.
Now my problem is thus, if they’re going to reference Leviticus 18:22 and follow it to the letter, there are 859 verses in the book of Leviticus. Why don’t they adhere as strictly to the other 858?
Whenever I see people eating at the Ocean Basket, the perverse Pagan in me wants to scream at them, “Leviticus 11:10. You’re all DOOOOOOMED” . For the uninformed, this verse goes something along the lines of, “Thy shalt not eat at Ocean Basket for they taketh too long with thy order and the bill will be wrong-eth anyway”Okay, I lied. What it actually say’s is, “But anything in the seas or the rivers that does not have fins and scales, of the swarming creatures in the waters and of the living creatures that are in the waters, is detestable to you. So basically, this is banning Christians from eating Shell fish. Do they adhere to it? Nope. (Well, not the ones I know anyway)
Let’s look at some more laws from Leviticus:
Leviticus 19:28 reads, "You shall not make any cuts in your body for the dead nor make any tattoo marks on yourselves: I am the Lord." So, no tattoos. All those crucifixes and “Jesus Saves” tattoos will have to go guys!
Leviticus 19:27 reads "You shall not round off the side-growth of your heads nor harm the edges of your beard” No round bowled haircuts? So the Beatles and the Monkees will be going to hell then? Leviticus 11:7-8 reads “And the swine, though he divide the hoof, and be clovenfooted, yet he cheweth not the cud; he is unclean to you” This means NO pork roasts, no bacon and sorry people, no Ham ‘n Cheese toasties!
Leviticus 15: 1-3 “The Lord said to Moses and Aaron, “Speak to the Israelites and say to them: ‘When any man has a bodily discharge, the discharge is unclean. Whether it continues flowing from his body or is blocked, it will make him unclean. This is how his discharge will bring about uncleanness” Yuck. Sorry boys. You’ll have to cancel that subscription to FHM.
Leviticus 19:31 reads "Do not turn to mediums or spiritists; do not seek them out to be defiled by them. I am the Lord your God." Translated, no horoscopes, no psychics and no fortune tellers allowed.
Leviticus 19:16 goes “Thou shalt not go up and down as a talebearer among thy people”. No gossiping! No Heat magazine! Oh, the horror!
Oh, and for all the farmers out there, there is a verse just for you: Leviticus 19:19 "Keep my decrees. Do no mate different kind of animals. do not plant your field with two kinds of seed" So you'd better not be letting your cows graze with your goats or planting pumpkin and cucumber seeds in the same field. Dooomed, I tell you!
Lastly, no bible would be complete without a fashion guide. God orders you to go with long hair, and not to shave. (Lev.19:27) More importantly, you may not wear clothing of more than one material. (Lev.19:19). Got any clothes with wool and cotton? Or any two fabrics mixed together? Oh, no! Take them off and burn them! Quick!
So all you Christians who think it’s a sin to be gay, I say this. Better read the Bible VERY closely, because the same section that bans gay male sex contains a thousand and one other claims. If you're going to ignore the section of Leviticus that bans tattoos, pork, shellfish, round haircuts and the like, how can you possibly turn around and quote Leviticus 18:22 as irrefutable law?
